So you know that old adage, where’s the time gone? I have just spent over an hour sorting through the hamster food and picking out the bits he likes and binning the rest, although Harry did ask to eat it.
You think I’m fussing over a hamster or making it up? I bought the thing some giant whole sunflower seeds he loved them. You can only get them online so I grabbed a packet of peeled or should it be shelled? Sunflower seeds and the pesky brute won’t eat them! Seriously, I left them in his food bowl to try out the, if he’s starving he’ll eat them method, but no! I caved first.
Anyway, I seem to have got side tracked, this story is supposed to be about Ollie and his bright ideas.
So, are you sitting comfortably? (I’m assured by Grandad this is how all good stories start)Then I’ll begin.
Our little Ollie has been a bit of a worry wart recently, even jumping at his own shadow. For the last few months he’s been waking in the middle of the night and then coming to get me. We’ve got in to a little pattern whereby he wakes me up, I leave mine and Lee’s bedroom, I pop my pillows and teddy on the floor while I go for a wee, Ollie lies on them whilst he waits and then we go upstairs to his room and snuggle up in the spare bed together. Then in the morning after the first alarm goes, Harry comes in for a 10 minute group cuddle.
Yes it’s all very lovely, but on account of my pesky old knees it means I usually struggle to get back to sleep and let’s just say it’s been making Mummy a bit grumpy! When my husband reads this I bet he mutters “yeah, just a bit” under his breath!
So I put it to Ollie that maybe he could stop doing it on school nights and I’d sleep up there on Friday and Saturdays. That idea didn’t seem to get through until I suggested that maybe I should take away his computer privileges as it seemed to be them scaring them. Well that idea worked a dream, but Ollie had other reasoning.
Ollie has started going to bed naked. Well naked apart from his pull up pants. I worried about this at first but then read that childrens bladders can sometimes remain uncontrollable through night until the age of 7 so I’ll put off worrying about it until then.
Anyways Ollie explained that by doing this in the middle of the night, outside of his toasty duvet, it just seems too cold and too much effort to bother coming to get me.
Good plan Ollie!
Although, between us, I’m still enjoying sleeping in their room twice a week. I like their glow in the dark stickers and the under the sea projector light and the cuddles, but that’s our secret.
Hope you have a smashing weekend.
Love and hugs, kisses and wishes xxx
P.s if you haven’t Googled it already, you shell a sunflower seed, although I’m guessing some of you knew that already.
Now I’m usually pretty partial to a Friday, keen to grab it by the ears and give it a big kiss on the lips, but I feel yesterday was out to get me!
Let’s start with I’d not had the best nights sleep and my knees were hurting. I’m now officially one of those old ladies who can predict the weather through a bodily joint.
I’d decided on treating myself to a Costa coffee, it was a drive thru and I continued my intimate chat to my bestie on hands free much to the amusement of the barista who I think learned a few things!
So much was my need for coffee I’d forgotten to pack lunch.
The whole day was pretty much a blur under a blanket of a tension headache with added queasiness, no I’m not pregnant. I ended up working through my window to nip out and grab a bite to eat but it was my choice and if I hadn’t the person I was working with might not have got food on her table at all.
I left a little earlier to compensate but that’s when the real “fun” began.
I’d left my pesky ticket in the car so couldn’t access the car park. I pressed the call button on the outside, but the three separate times it was answer they all acted like there was no one there.
Not being held down like Chumbawumba I marched down the road (in my head I did, but it was more of a limp) to the other entrance of the car park. I tried the call button there which was so loud a person going into Proper Job gave me a confused look. Do you remember the Dom Joly “I’m on the phone” sketches? Like that! I patiently smiled back at the man but my eyes told him I was “hangry” so he moved a long.
Luckily a nice chap who had just bought a McDonald’s had paid for his ticket but he couldn’t get the door to work. I mean he had the ticket upside down and the wrong way round and was putting it in the wrong slot, but I was too busy trying not to salivate on his head with the smell from his lunch to say anything (he was quite short).
Eventually we got through and it’s all another blur with a very heavy rainfall whilst waiting outside the school gates until out of nowhere my little Harry slipped his had in to mine and said “it’s okay Mummy, let’s go home”
We got through the door and I made the boys a Fat Friday treat picky tea of doorstop tiger bread toast, Dairylea dunkers, dried chewy apple rings and yoghurt coated raisins and a yummy mango and passion fruit smoothie.
They played happily on Roblox while I pootled about.
My beautiful husband came home and together we spent some quality time with the boys and then went through the nightly ablutions to get the little ***** to bed.
Them tucked up nicely Lee plonked me in the bath to soak my worries away whilst he cooked us steak and poured the Prosecco.
Friday I could grab you by the ears and kiss you on the lips I thought to myself.
Well what a turnaround. Life is too short and delicious to let a whole day be wasted xxx
I should warn you from the get go that this is not one of my jaunty little tales about the Twinkles. It’s an honest, warts and all, account about health. So it will not be funny or pretty, but it will be open and honest. This is not a cry for attention or sympathy, but to raise awareness and empathy for those who may be going through the same thing or should you cross the path of someone who is.
The crux of the matter is that I have arthritis in my knees. Stupidly it’s something I am embarrassed to admit as it’s the only thing in my life that makes me feel old. Having had a 6 week stint in hospital in my 20s and contracting MSRA, I’m thankful I still have working legs so don’t like to moan and there are always people worse off than you.
So getting down to the nitty gritty, I was sent to see a consultant who gave me a few different options, but agreed it was time to get me on the big guns pain medication as it was painful even to drive Bluebell, my automatic car!
Naproxen is so strong you have to take another tablet beforehand to try and protect your stomach lining.
I had barely been on it a week when I turned to Lee one evening and told him I didn’t want to be a mum, I’d never wanted to be a Mum and it’s the most thankless chore there ever was and I was quite angry about it.
We decided then and there I should stop taking the tablets as being a Mum and having my own family had been my life long ambition.
Weeks went by and the pain got worse so back to the doctors I went. I explained the Naproxen had messed with my head, but the doctor found that very odd and said she’d never come across anything like that before and she’d been a doctor for a long time. I was advised to start taking them again and really let them get in to my system which I did with Lee’s support.
Luckily my feelings about being a mum didn’t change although I did start thinking that Harry and Ollie were going to die every five minutes.
After nearly two solid weeks of diarrhoea I decided to go back to the doctor. They were busy so I went to see our pharmacist at Milton Pharmacy who is a legend. She took me in to the side room so I could talk to her privately. I said I thought it might be my tablets as certain brands seem to effect me more. My stomach felt like it had acid in it, I could constantly taste it and lost every meal or snack within an hour of eating it. How unfair is this though? Diarrhoea for 2 weeks and I lost a measly 1lb! Where’s the silver lining? The pharmacist talked me through how I should be taking the tablets and I’d got it all wrong. Within a few days the diarrhoea subsided.
Fatigue, like depression can never be fully comprehended by someone who hasn’t suffered it themself. It’s not a case of just being tired and getting over it with some sleep or a Power Nap. It does not go away. It’s a fuzzy head, feeling like you’re trying to walk through treacle, not being able to think straight or even remember the simplest of things, virtually crying at the thought of having to move or make plans or even try and think what to have for tea. When you have two young children and a job you don’t have a choice but to get on with it. I was popping caffeine pills like they were Smarties. My coffee was strength 6 and I drank the equivalent of 12 espressos with breakfast to get me up and going. I remember being at the bottom of the stairs in the car park and realising I’d left my travel mug on top of my car, I did cry a bit whilst weighing up the physical pain of walking back up the steps against the lack of caffeine and remembered I had a stash of coffee in my pedestal which would have to suffice. Adding to the tiredness was that I was waking every night feeling anxious and panicking. I don’t know if I was having nightmares but it was every night without fail.
We’ve just got back from our family holiday. Overall it was wonderful, my boys made it that way, all three of them. However one day I was sat by the pool on a sun lounger, sangria in hand, 22degrees not a cloud in the sky, I could hear Harry and Ollie laughing in the pool and I honestly thought to myself, is this it? Is this all life has to offer and I felt bored!
WHAT????
That was the reality check. That was when from somewhere deep inside a little voice said that’s just not rational, you shouldn’t be feeling like that. At this point the sodium in the Naproxen had made my feet swell up so much I could only fit in to Lee’s Havianas, his feet are three sizes bigger than mine and even then they were snug.
ENOUGH the voice said growing stronger!
Lee’s not really one to talk about feelings, but I talked it through with him and he suggested CBD oil to help with managing the pain.
Lee and the boys are very active and we’d been doing a minimum of 10,000 steps a day plus Harry and I love the water so I’d been in the pool with him most days. All the exercise had definitely loosened up my knees and was living proof it was the way to move forward, literally.
It was the last day of the holiday but I decided then and there to stop taking the painkillers.
It’s coming up for a week and I have made myself keep active. Lee jokes he’s supporting me when he gets me to go to the kitchen for snacks. I have got on my exercise bike every day for 20 minutes without fail even in the clothes I have worn to work to make sure it gets done. I researched CBD oil online and decided to go with one from Holland and Barratt where the lovely lady talked me through how she takes hers for migraines. I’m sleeping properly (well as properly as you can with 6 year old twins)so have stopped drinking coffee and down to one caffeine tablet a morning.
I’ve made a pledge to myself to lose 3 stone and I’m rather looking forward to getting on the scales tomorrow morning. My mental health seems to be completely back on track and I’m no longer feeling anxious and back to appreciating every last drop of every day. Once again there is hope.
Well, this has been therapeutic to write, so I hope it goes on to help a few who may read it.
Never underestimate the well-being value attached to being able to flush toilet paper and not have to put it in a bin next to you that doesn’t have a lid!
That is literally the only minus I can find to Fuerteventura and if that’s all there is to complain about then you’re doing well!
We just got back, midnight Monday evening and the holiday was wonderful!
Sun, sea, sand and the boys even went to Mini club THREE times!!! That was nearly 6 delicious hours of grown up time and boy did we lap it up! Lee had to pay the boys to go, but I believe it was money well spent!
I think we have found our new favourite place in Caleta de Fuste and have already agreed to go back, although quite where Ollie has got the idea it will be for 11 days from I don’t know!
I shan’t bore you with the whole shenanigans, but here are a few snippets.
1. Lee had gone to take Ollie to mini club. I was taking my sweet time to put my suntan lotion on because I’d promise Harry I’d get in the pool with him once I had. The pool was not heated and seemed to repel the suns warm rays. All of a sudden I noticed the lifeguard pointing out a sign to Harry. Oh goodness! I remember the sign at my swimming pool when I was learning to swim saying no heavy petting! Anyway, Harry came running over so I asked him what was occurring. He said he’d been told not to dive! Not to dive? Harry you’re grade 2 and can barely swim what’s he taking about diving? Turns out Harry had learned how to dive on YouTube and was giving it a go, he was pretty good truth be told!
2. Lee took the boys off rock climbing and exploring a few times to give me some chill time (best husband EVER!) They always came back with treasure, shells, sea glass that sort of thing. One evening I could not get to sleep because of a tapping noise. Lee couldn’t hear it until there was a sudden clatter. Turns out one of the shells was inhabited and walked off the side, so he popped it in the bathroom sink. Later that night I could still hear it tapping so I put it outside. When we went to breakfast the next morning it was still there by the front door, waiting obediently. So after we’d eaten (the food was so good! 5lbs up good!) we went on a mission to free Willy.
3. The boys had just got back from another escapade and were all acting shifty when I came out the bathroom. In the end Ollie asked me if I was hungry which was odd, but made me look at the bar which had a fairly large intact crab on it. This did make me jump, but it was very dead.
4. The boys seemed to become celebrities on site. Fist pumping random people, blowing kisses, high fives all over the place, they knew more people than we did! Ollie’s favourite friends were Paul, Michael and Tarquin (he was actually called John, but changed his name every day) Michael turned 80 whilst on holiday and Paul informed Lee and I he was old enough to be our Dad, but the boys rushed over to great them every time and have an in-depth conversation about whatever was tickling them. They were real friends!
5. Walking past a chap with a metal prosthetic leg one evening Ollie went up to him and gave him the thumbs up and said cool robot leg! The chap was really touched and actually thanked me for raising him that way, I assured him it was all Ollie and Harry would have been the same, but him and Lee were saving us good seats for the mini disco. Hands on hips Ollie was asking him lots of questions like did it make him swim faster, did he have any other super powers?
6. One evening, Ollie surprised us by choosing a song and getting up on stage and singing karaoke! We were shocked and both Lee and I got teary eyed! The cheers he got and the chants from the audience of Ollie! Ollie! I should also say that there was not a day that went by where Harry didn’t go on the stage and jump in to the box splits, the shouts from the audience were a bit different, especially from the men!
7. There were some lovely girls behind us on the plane coming home, I think Harry fell in love with one of them. I did have to chuckle at their conversation though. They were saying that the plane menu was really fancy and didn’t know what half the things were. Pastrami being one which was then described by the lead as being like corned beef?
8. Ollie perpetually had a dirty face, usually around his mouth. On the coach on the way home he would NOT let me clean it, I was offering wipes, not spit on a tissue! He reckoned it wasn’t dirty and said this, “ Mum, you think my face is dirty, I think that it is clean so let’s just agree to disagree!” But I can see it was my response after laughing.
9. Finally back in England we were on the little transfer bus from the plane to the airport. Everyone was tired and cold. Harry looked up at Lee and I and asked if he was going to be tall like us. I said that I believed he would be taller than both of us by the time he was 15! Out of nowhere Ollie pipes up with “ you’ll be dead by then mum!” The people around us couldn’t help it and all burst out laughing!
We were all sad to go, but happy to be back. We work hard so we can spend these quality times together and it makes it all so worth it!
So our little Ollie has been delightful and delicious this week! So has Harry in his own way, but it was Ollies turn to shine.
His gems tend to come from the back seat whilst I’m driving.
The other day, out of nowhere, he asked me in all seriousness if a turd was a frog? For a second there I was tempted to say yes, but after I’d stopped giggling I corrected him which resulted in him laughing his head off.
Simple things.
On pancake day I wasn’t sure if I had all the ingredients necessary, I know there’s only three, but the boys couldn’t be bothered to do a detour to the shops on the way home. Then from the backseat came these words of wisdom,
“Mummy, if you believe you can do it, you will do it!”
Which is all well and good, but I’m not Jesus, I can’t magic up Flour.
But would you believe it if I found everything I needed nestled in the crevices of my drawers, ooh, I might have to reword that, just as Ollie walked past and gave me a nod to say “I told you so” and a pat on the back coupled with a good job Mummy.
I’m sorry, how old are you? 6? Are you sure?
Lastly on the rare occasion the boys were bothering to have an input in what they had for dinner, they usually ask me to surprise them, Ollie asked for potatoes in their wrappers. I asked if he meant potato skins and he said yes and then thought it was gross. I reassured him it wasn’t cruelty to potatoes.
Actually, while I have you, I was in the bath (shocking I know) when Harry decided to come in and use the toilet right next to me instead of the one downstairs. (Two toilets, we’re living the dream and when we first moved that is what the boys told everyone about our house! Not that we are by the beach and woods and even have a garden!)
So I turned to Harry to try and deter him from future over sharing and said
“ Harry I can see your penis!”
And without a thought he retorted,
“That’s okay mummy, you grew it!” and walked off.
Love and hugs, kisses and wishes xxx
This is Ollies drawing to remind him that when he is older he wants to do a job that looks after the environment and keeps the world looking pretty x
I literally don’t know where I’d be without Google! I use it at least once or twice a day! What did I do before? How did I cope? Did I have the same thirst for knowledge as I do now with it so readily available at my fingertips?
Harry and Ollies go to is most definitely YouTube. Apparently I don’t pronounce it right? They are protective over it like a school friend. I get a lot of random information which I then check on Google.
The other morning. I’d only just woken up, barely wiped the sleep out of my eyes (anyone else now singing the Monkees? Bonus point if you can name the song) when Ollie shook me, patted me on the face and said,
“Mum, mum, MUM, did you know that snails are more deadly than sharks?”
Me “no”
“Mum, yes Mum, sharks kill only 1 person a year but snails kill 10’000 a day!!!”
Well that just made me snort and roar with laughter! Okay, now I’m awake!
I would ask Alexa but we’re not on speaking terms at the moment because she is worse behaved than my children! Tilly my Westie is still the best!
Google, come to my aid!
So I’m laughing and searching, and then “Oh’ing” and frowning and reading some more and then oh my gosh.
So the fact of the matter is this, the freshwater snail IS deadly and kills more humans than sharks, lions and wolves combined! 200,000 a year to be precise! Well goodness me! I won’t go in to details in case you are eating your cornflakes!
So Harry pipes up to tell me that I can now start eating snails again!
ONE TIME, IT WAS ONE TIME, in Paris and it’s good to try new things.
I remember standing in Tesco waiting to pay at the till during the “Harry and Ollie love snails so much they want 59 for pets” stage when Ollie looked up at me with big, baby eyes (better even than Puss in Boots could muster) and whimpered “mum, you won’t eat our pet snails will you?”
Mortifying!
Right, we’re off to a water park to celebrate Stepmonster 2’s birthday today! We’ve already done cake for breakfast and presents and new birthday clothes!
For those who don’t know and before you reach for the phone to call Childline, we have a Stepmonster gang, I’m their Stepmonster and they are mine x we made it up years ago in the spirit of inclusivity.
My bath is back and so am I! I always thought I was solar powered, but hydra works also! Outdoors bath there’d be no stopping me, well, the neighbours might have something to say and the English weather.
It’s been weeks! My own little purgatory.
So our plumber was due to come last Wednesday, then pushed the time back on the day and finally at 6pm I decided he wasn’t going to show, so I sent him a poochy text along the lines of, I assume you’re not turning up and I would have appreciated a call, and absolutely no kisses or emojis, which for me is hard, in texts I literally use them as punctuation x either it looks cute or like I’m swearing a lot.
I received an apology back and message to say he’d been caught on a job, I didn’t even respond, ha, that’ll show him I thought to myself all high and mighty like.
He text again the next morning to come over after the school run and to fit in whatever time suited best. I checked with Lee first, but already melted a little bit and agreed to it.
By the time he’d got to the door that evening I’d long forgotten I was cross. To be fair, I was probably more wound up because Harry and Ollie had downloaded a game so they could ring doorbells and I kept thinking it was ours and getting up which they found hilarious. Pesky pranksters.
So there he was on the doorstep and Harry offered him a half eaten cookie from his pocket, he gratefully declined and went on to explain he’d gone to do a 30 minute job at an old ladies house and found a gas leak and stayed on for 3 hours to find said leak so he wouldn’t have to turn her gas off.
How do you feel?
I offered him so many cups of tea!
He went to service our boiler and then worked out what was stoping the water from running hot and then even told us the best and cheapest way of getting it repaired which basically did him out of a job! What a guy!
So the Ideal Boiler engineer came out yesterday and Lee dealt with it all so I could go out to play with the boys. Winner winner x
Off we went to Puxton Park to see our friends and Harry nearly gave me a heart attack when he decided to do the high ropes. He looked so tiny. So brave. I didn’t know how loudly I was cheering him on until my throat was sore afterwards. Looking upwards I didn’t realise I’d practically walked into a gathering of Mums. Still mid shout I caught their eyes, there was a short silence and then one of them gently called to her child, well done dear. I backed away. Fog horn and pom poms behind my back.
The other morning we were having breakfast on the sofa in our jam jams when I pointed out to Harry that he could make a mess out of any food and was physically incapable of eating anything without dropping it down his front. So I told him I was going to nickname him Crumbs.
I then turned to Ollie and said that because he is incapable of sitting still or doing anything without fiddling I would name him Fidget.
So in the spirit of fairness I told the boys they could give me a nickname. Without hesitation Harry said he was going to call me Flower and Ollie whole heartedly agreed. Lush buckets. I thought it would be something like Grumpy or Shouts A Lot.
Right, we have more shenanigans to get up to today so I’d best get a wiggle on, but before I do, something made me quickly look up the meaning for Hydra and it’s not water as I first thought. Let’s go for the Greek mythology version which is funniest in this scenario,
The Hydra was a serpent-like water monster with nine heads that is often referenced in Greek mythology. It was an offspring of Typhon and Echidna bred by Hera to kill Hercules. It was Hercules responsibility to slay the beast during his twelve Labors for King Eurystheus.
I’m sorry I haven’t been around much, truth be told I haven’t been feeling it, but you don’t need to hear about my melancholies, no if you wanted to feel sad you’d be reading a newspaper.
Also my bath isn’t working!
Da da daaaaaaa! ( just Googled that and turned out it is the correct spelling! Who knew?! Well apart from Google and probably Rob from work).
I can’t run a full bath without it running cold! I told someone I thought it was the Flex Capacitor, turns out that’s something completely different unless I want my bath to time travel. That might be cool, but do I want to turn up anywhere naked, no matter the time line? For now I’d just like it to be hot! My bath that is.
It turns out if I’m prepared to settle for it being luke warm there is a sweet spot setting that will keep it running, but finding that gauge is harder than navigating a conversation with my hormonal step children.
It is probably fair to say then that my bath is my muse.
So if I were to become a famous writer would that mean I could insure my bath like Cristiano Ronaldo has his legs? Oh my gosh, listen to what these other celebrities have insured for realsies!
• Jennifer Lopez, her bottom
• Charlie Chaplin his feet
• Dolly Parton her boobies
• Julia Roberts her smile
• Mariah Carey her legs
I bet out of all of those it was Charlie Chaplins feet that made you raise an eyebrow. I also bet you chuckled at the word boobies unless you’re my Dad and for those who really know me, yes I did mutter under my breath that Julia Roberts sure hadn’t insured her armpits which she failed to shave for the red carpet. I just can’t forgive her for that. Yes I know it’s her right but I’m entitled to my opinion.
Who would have thought my bath could be linked to Julia Roberts armpits surely that’s the most tenacious link yet!
What news from the Twinkles?
Well Harry is still zapping me with his charm! I put my glasses on the other day to finish knitting some baby booties for my friend who is 26 so that makes me young and cool by association! Anyway Harry called me Grandma. I informed him you need to have grandchildren to be a grandmother to which he responded “well you look like one” and went back to killing his friends on Roblox.
Ollie was feeling particularly emotional the other day and when I informed him Teen Titans had finished he had a complete melt down which ended with him screaming at me that he’d had a really bad day because he had actually nearly died. It later transpired that he did not have a near death experience but another student had jokingly held a fork near his neck which had been stopped by a teacher pretty much as soon as it started.
They say that those people who walk on hot coals are actually using power of mind and telling themselves it is green green grass. There is no force I can use strong enough to pretend this bath is warm enough for me to stay in it any longer! Until it is fixed I might have to down size to limericks but I’m not very good at those.
Love and hugs, kisses and wishes xxx
Whatever the weather there is always the beach and whenever I’m there I always feel closer to you Mum xxx
Please bear with me or should that be bare? I always find those two confusing! Nope, definitely bear, we don’t need to all be getting naked although I am writing this from the bath where it is a necessity.
Anyway, as I was saying, I’m still slightly groggy with coming out from hibernation.
So, Christmas! What did we get? Something fluffy? Something cuddly? Something to make us smell nice, a tiny tincture maybe? Nope, blinking StrepA! Well thank you Santa Claus! I really thought I’d made the nice list! I would have preferred a lump of coal, but the way the fuel prices are going that might end up being what you get if you are on the good list! Fuel, this seasons gold and must have!
All that being said, we still had a wonderful Christmas Day spent in our new pyjamas, eating yummy food, playing games, watching films, opening pressies and laughing. Not laughing at the presents! Just laughing in general, there’s always a lot of that in our home and that’s one of the things I love the most.
Tuesday 2nd January Lee was back to work and the boys had a much needed inset day. The dogs were getting groomed and so were the boys, not at the same place as one of my mum friends questioned.
Another Mum friend popped something into the WhatsApp group about school. Bless her barnacles I thought to myself, she is ready to drop with a baby not exhaustion. So I gently reminded her it was an inset day only to receive a barrage of texts to the contrary from several of the mums.
It was 07:51! School starts at 08:30. I start work at 08:00! Lee had already left. I was still in my pyjamas and my hair was greasy. It was a **** show! But somehow we got through it and made it. Someone suggested the short notice made it easier for the boys to start their first day back, but I’m telling you it’s not a life style choice.
We’ve made it to Friday. Thank Crunchie and every other chocolate bar in the Galaxy! It appears I’ve accidentally stopped drinking alcohol. It wasn’t a conscious decision and I’m pretty sure I won’t be partaking in Dry January (quitters!), but so far I accidentally have and before you ask, no I don’t feel better for it.
2023 has been kind so far and having got in touch with my more Spiritual side due to the loss of a loved one on Boxing Day I can see a glimmer of light on the horizon, rays of hope and positivity.
So come on people, fresh year, new canvas, ready to paint what you wish. Mine is definitely going to be filled with sunshine, lollipops and rainbows.
Love and hugs, kisses and wishes xxx
Harry reckoned he liked Port, not sure this was the case. Well something had to get them to sleep on New Years Eve! Xxx
So our besties, Auntie Kayleigh and Uncle Matt came over last night. We don’t get to see them very often, soon after they arrived I was reminded for why.
The Twinkles were “eating” their dinner. I use the word “eating” lightly in the case of young Oliver. He’s not really one for eating, he’d much prefer to drink his meals and not in the same fun way I enjoy drinking mine. She says whilst taking a swig of her Baileys coffee. What?! It’s Christmas! Bet Noddy Holder enjoyed a Baileys coffee or 6 during the season which literally tells us “to be merry!”
I digress.
Ollie decided he didn’t want to eat the meal I’d lovingly slow cooked for 7 hours for him. So the child was with cough and full of bogies, he still could eat and I told him so!
I had him sat on the sofa next to me and I told him in no uncertain terms he WAS going to eat 5 spoonfuls of his chicken casserole and rice. Kayleigh was about to do the same for Harry, not fair for him to miss out on the chance of being spoon fed at 6!
The first mouthful Ollie masticated and pondered over in the dramatic way he does. To which I informed him that I was starting to lose my temper and he was going to eat.
His response was to shake his head and turn in to something from the exorcist and projectile vomit what was a lot more than the one mouthful he had taken.
I still can’t fathom why this resulted in me jumping forward and catching said sick in my hands and throwing it in the food bowl next to me, which unfortunately turned out to be Harry’s.
Ollie still managed to get it down himself and various cracks in the sofa.
I got Ollie upstairs to the bathroom and called to Lee to clear up the lounge. He’d been happily drinking a cider and chatting to Uncle Matt unaware of the onslaught.
Trying to manoeuvre Ollie out of his clothes whilst containing the sick and not smearing it over him is a talent in itself.
Ollie had gone a nasty shade of grey and very quiet.
Unsure what to do I asked Harry to come and take a bath with Ollie to contain the situation and get them to bed quicker.
Harry obliged but only once I’d found his swim shorts as he didn’t want Auntie Kayleigh “ to see his penis” I assured him she didn’t want to see it either!
Boys in the bath, Kayleigh and I perched on the side and I suggested it was surely time for us to crack open a cider. Kayleigh and I, not the twins.
We were all enjoying watching TikTok when Ollie looked like he was going to chunder. Yet again I jumped forward and caught it in my hands. Kayleigh was trying to empty the soap dish for something to use as a container when I yelled at her to lift the toilet seat so I could throw the sick in there.
Harry just sat in the bath looking at us all and laughing. We both suggested he get out but he was quite happy.
I snuggled Ollie up in a towel and got him ready for bed with two pillows so he was practically sat up and a bowl next to him. Lee got him a hot water bottle and made sure we could see and hear him clearly on the monitor.
I went back down to sit with Harry who told me some of Ollies sick was still in the bath and felt like pasta! With that I got him out and ready for bed.
So, to cut a long story short, the reason we haven’t seen Auntie Kayleigh and Uncle Matt in a while is because we have pesky germ filled children!
We are supposed to be at our friends today enjoy a Christmas party and a bit of festive biscuit decorating, maybe even a Vol-au- vent or two, but NO! We have children so we are still sat in our pyjamas, responding to their every whim and catching the odd handful of sick here and there!
A cheeky little Twinkle update xxx 