And breathe xxx

I was so close to screaming, not even exaggerating! I could feel it welling up inside of me yearning to come out out in one tremendous banshee wail! But I didn’t, I abstained. I did however tell the boys who thought about it for a few seconds and then either decided to ignore me or pretend not to hear.

It was a simple task. All we needed to do was leave the house and go to soft play and it was for THEM! Could I light a rocket under their tiny bottoms? You’d have more chance getting a quick response from Land Registry! (Those in the know, know!)

Why is it so hard? I remember those heady days of deciding I needed to pop out on a fanciful whim and just picking my keys up and walking out the front door, it’s strange the things you take for granted!

I was up bright and early as always. I’d got the boys changed (Harry doesn’t like to come downstairs in his pyjamas, not even on Christmas Day?!). It was like trying to dress an eel, especially Ollie who had decided he wanted to wear his Ninja costume. I suggested to him, as it was our first time of going, that we would see the lie of the land and maybe next time dress up.

Harry was particularly grumpy, likes to be up, but not a morning person, I wonder if he’s just punishing me for something I’m unaware of. He tends to lighten up once I’ve fed him so Twinkle breakfast is usually the first order of the day.

I found something hypnotising on tv for them to watch, think it was Bitz and Bobs (love the catchy theme tune, often find myself humming it) made sure they had their breakfast tray in front of them containing absolutely nothing of choking size and whizzed upstairs for a shower and to get changed, literally getting dressed in the dark and covering the day before makeup with a fresh layer, sexy!

Thing is the lounge is under our bedroom and with Ollies glue ear he only has one volume at the moment which is LOUD! He also comes up to you like a little old man cupping his ear when he actually wants to hear what you’re saying. Im tempted to buy him an ear horn for the novelty factor.

I asked of them one thing and one thing only, to let Daddy sleep! He had worked the Saturday and it was his only chance of a lie in and believe me he’d earned it.

Have you ever tried to shout at a child to keep the noise down whilst trying to keep the noise down yourself? It comes out of gritted teeth and many flaying arm gestures! Kudos to the boys that they took it seriously and didn’t just laugh straight in my face.

Breakfast done and I’d even had the foresight to stuff a tea towel in the front of Harry’s shirt. He currently allows me to do it as he has seen Grandad do it so it’s still cool! Grandad puts his own on though.

I tell them to both put their socks and shoes on whilst frantically running around grabbing the things we need, birthday presents, tissues, calpol, where’s my socks??

All the time darting from room to room watching the minutes tick away until we are officially late and Ollie has some Lego figure man in his hand whilst singing and twirling and generally just being everywhere I need to be and under my feet until I feel like Gulliver in Gulliver’s Travels surrounded by mini people working against me.

Finally everyone is dressed and ready to go out the door.

No they’re not, Harry needs a wee! Ollie decides to shout at him about something so gets told off for being noisy.

Now we’re ready to leave. No we’re not, Ollie needs a wee!!! So why didn’t he have one a minute ago when Harry went? Oh, he didn’t need one then, BUT IT WAS THREE SECONDS AGO!!

Right, out the door, dogs wrestled back in to the house, at the car, in the rain, where’s my bloody car keys???

Ollie “ Mummy you shouldn’t say bloody!”

Me “ I didn’t think I’d said it out loud but you’re right dear!”

Finally at soft play, my friend has already got us a seat right at the front opposite what is effectively a cage filled with fun stuff. I love it, they’re safe and contained. They love it, they can go wild.

Coffee in hand, turn to have an adult conversation with the oasis of serenity that is Kat. Coffee in hand I realise I am rocking and not taking in anything she is saying. I literally had to turn to her and say, please just give me a few minutes to wind down and adjust and I’ll be right with you.

I felt the stress ebb away, Ollie then came over to give me a thank you cuddle and Harry threw me a smiling thumbs up from the climbing frame and just like that we were back again. My boys, my miracles, they are so worth it all.

Gosh, I’d best get them up and ready for school! You know the drill!!

Love & hugs, kisses & wishes xxx