Slurps up xxx

Would someone please pass me the Valium? I’d settle for a stiff drink! Or both, I mean I do have two hands!

So yesterday started at 04:38 because of the dog, trials and tribulations of having fluffy friends.

Twinkle 1 decided his day would start at 05:43, bang goes my luxurious private bath, in steps 102 questions about where my willy has gone and if I wee out my bum.

He was not feeling breakfast club yesterday morning and let the whole of the school, road, city know about it, but that is not why I need mood altering vices.

Of their own volition the boys have decided to go vegetarian. I have now been bullied in to joining the crusade as “if I eat all the animals where will be none left”.

Lee being the truly scrumptious, supportive husband and daddy that he is went to Farmfoods and stocked up on Quorn products, he bought the whole aisle.

I decided to buy a book. I am one who likes to buy a book to help prep for any life situation and already have a book on hamsters winging its way to me in preparation for the boys birthday end of November.

I digress.

I bought a vegetarian family recipe book for the whole family and picky eaters it said.

The boys did not get that memo!

I’ve made them seedy banana bars, they did not like them. I made them easy cheesy lasagne, they would not eat it. I made them red lentil pasta with crunchy toasted chickpeas and fresh smashed avocado pesto, well that meal could “do one” too.

Why do I bother? Yes I know, because I love them blah blah blah.

Yesterday I was tired. I’d had the stuffing knocked out of me. I already knew the boys would complain about their lovingly slaved over dinner because they are tired too, but I can count on Ollie to at least fill up on pudding.

I usually blackmail them in to eating their dinner with the thought of desert.

For the first time EVER, Ollie complained about his afters. I wasn’t prepared for that, it damn near pushed me over the edge!

They like my fizzy jelly (jelly made with lemonade instead of water) and he’d decided he wanted it with custard ( only Ambrosia will do, they get that from their Dad. He’s not fussy about clothes labels, but when it comes to food, colour him a snob!!) However Ollie decided he only likes warm custard!! I explained to him that you can’t have warm custard with cold jelly, but he wasn’t having none of it and continued to wail in to a sofa cushion.

I picked up his dish, took it in to the kitchen, threw it in to the microwave (literally and it’s plastic, the bowl not the microwave, obvs) and pinged it for 1 minute.

Rather pleased with myself that it had turned in to a two tone liquid I took it back and served it to him.

“Here, this is what happens when you serve jelly with warm custard”

“ ooh yummy” he said with a smile on his face and picked his bowl up and started slurping it from the side.

I looked to Harry for support. He said he wanted the same done to his!!

I brought his microwaved pudding back from the kitchen with a straw for each of them.

Sometimes you just have to give up and laugh xxx