“C”

Not only was it Friday, but it was the beginning of half term holiday and pay day to boot! Could a day feel more peachy?

4pm hit and I was packed up and skipping out the door in a jiffy on my way to collect the Twinkles and take them for a celebratory jolly around the woods. Wasn’t that jolly, Harry needed a poo! I swear I’ve started to pick up more child’s poo in them there woods than dog poo and why they feel the need to tell every dog walker they’ve relieved themselves and point to the bag I’m holding in pride, I will never know, but it becomes a little less embarrassing every time.

Oh what plans we had, because we could, the pandemic had finally started to behave and subside.

Weekend of fun with the Stepmonster gang, the Twinkles and I finally getting the chance to see Lee play football in a charity game, a big fat family reunion as we haven’t all been together in over a year, Tuesday a day to myself with Lee at work and the boys at nursery and Wednesday off to Kent for a couple of days to see our close friends and dear Aunt Joan and Uncle Dick and then finally a peaceful weekend, just the four of us to relax and lock in the memories of June half term 2021.

Well that was the blinking plan anyway!

We’ve been so careful to keep Coronavirus at bay especially as Lee has asthma. We’ve followed the rules meticulously and even put a ban on hugs (which as a hugger is torture). We’ve been so good and now Covid is in our home, sat upstairs playing on the Xbox.

There was a text from my stepsons school Saturday to say there had been a positive case in his year. That was quickly followed by an email to say it had been found in his class and to self isolate for 10 days. Our world was turned upside down, but we went in to survival mode automatic. What could we do and what couldn’t we do?

The first person I text was my boss, I knew she’d have the answers and she’s always so supportive, I really am very lucky.

My stepson was banished to his room, doesn’t that sound mean? Trust me, it isn’t, he has an Xbox and a bell! I dropped in a McDonalds for dinner yesterday ( we decided we could all do with a pick me up) and he gave me the biggest smile and told the friends he was playing against over the mic. I even heard him say he was living the dream my friends! Which is good, no it’s wonderful even because he had to take 3 tests (rapid and PCR) and he only has little nostrils and the news hit hard when it was a positive. So at least this isn’t a nightmare for him and we can laugh at me running after him when he needs the loo, cleaning all the door knobs etc with disinfectant.

Lee has been taking him out early evening for bike rides when no one is around to get him some exercise and fresh air, I’m not sure if we’re allowed to do this but he’s on his bike, doesn’t touch anything, it’s a safe and secluded cycle path and he doesn’t pick up £200 when he passes Go.
Next thing, get the hot tub clean and up. We seem to have a puncture but it is still holding water so at least the boys and my Stepdaughter have something to enjoy hours of fun in, especially as the sun is currently on our side.

We’ve all tested negative. We literally sat around the kitchen table and did our tests together, nothing like a family gagging session. Ollie found the whole thing hilarious, Harry not so much. We are still keeping away from the general public. Luckily we have the big woods on our doorstep and our beach, both you can walk for miles without bumping in to another human and there’s nothing to touch and leave germs, but I still have my Dettol wipes at the ready just in case. The children are okay, they are all just seeing it as a fun holiday together and Lee and I will be sure to keep it that way, make the most of some quality time together.

Sleep deprivation is a curse, especially in minefields like this one so Lee and I have been proper grown ups and are taking it in turns to get a good nights sleep, team work makes the dream work, very apt in this scenario.

I’ll be honest with you though, I woke up at 4am this morning feeling very anxious and desperately sad and could feel the darkness at the door. I don’t mean the band, whilst I enjoyed “I believe in a Thing Called Love”, they’re not personal friends. I mean the black hole, the chasm of despair.

I’d sent a message in our family group text as things unfolded and not one replied, maybe they didn’t know what to say, but I felt so alone. I sent a text to my Dad and he started talking about the fair? Each to their own and I’m sure he meant well.

I was able to have a good old rant to my friend we were due to be seeing and she soon had me feeling better! The sisterhood of friendship, the family we choose.

I took the dogs out to watch the sunrise and get the adrenaline flowing. My head was jumbled with negative thoughts of things we don’t have, worries and concerns, but the harder I marched I was able to tell myself to concentrate on all that we do have and all we have to look forward to and push the destructive emotions further away.

I even managed a whole hour in the bath.

I can hear the boys next door watching CBeebies and munching on their picky breakfast ( I can’t hear them eating or they’d be getting told off) Actually this blog has taken so long to write the Twinkles are now in the hot tub, but Harry was sure to ask Alexa to play Postman Pat for me first which I think he thought was thoughtful and that’s what counts.

Right, today I am planning a BBQ and to put the tent up in the garden so my stepson can join us.
We’ll make the best of the hand we’ve been dealt and with a positive attitude and a bit of hard work I’m sure we will make it a time we look back on fondly. We’ve got each other xxx